| |
 |
 |
|
I was really hurt when this spina bifida video refused to go viral. I still don’t know why it flopped. Did people doubt he really had SB? He does.
Oh and for the record, when you have this disease, any kind of exercise leads to crippling pain that night. The fact that we shot this video for a couple of hours meant his legs felt like he’d been running up and down mountains for a couple of weeks. But Noooooo, not funny enough. What’s even more disturbing than people not appreciating cripple torture is the people who took it seriously. Check out this comment…
11. HELLO KITTY ASSAULT RIFLE MISTAKEN FOR REAL
On Tuesday, the “progressive news site” Raw Story did a piece about a three-year-old in North Carolina who was killed while playing with a pink handgun. The site, which claims to feature “stories that get ignored in an infotainment culture,” used the dead child to tell us that gun manufacturers are evil for making guns that look like toys. Among their examples was the new Hello Kitty assault rifle that doesn’t exist. The writer saw a picture of the gun and assumed it was real. What kind of humorless ass-hat thinks Hello Kitty would license their product to a gun manufacturer? Did he think the Care Bear bulletproof vest was real, too?
-
10. VIDEO-GAME NERD MISTAKEN FOR GUN NUT
In January, tech blogger Stephen Totilo posted a picture of himself carrying an insane-looking toy gun from a video game. Despite the fact that this comical gun is much taller than he is, the anti-gun nuts used him as a poster child for everything that’s wrong with the world. About 500 people shared his image on Facebook and the image made it to a page called “Republican Bigotry Hate Fear and Distortion” with one commenter asking, “Is it any accident that he’s a dead-ringer for Lee Harvey Oswald?” If there’s one thing that’s becoming irrefutable about the gun debate, it’s that the anti-gun experts don’t know anything about guns.
-
The first thing that should have tipped people off was hearing about a black female pilot. I’ve never seen one. Have you? The Daily Currant is a funny-looking comedy site that claims to be “The Global Satirical Newspaper of Record,” but that didn’t stop dozens of people wishing death upon Coulter for being so intolerant. The article called her “Ann of mean labels” and claimed she said, “I mean what’s next? Are we gonna let Mexicans become doctors now? Jesus Christ people!” These uptight militants are so determined to prove America is the racist hellhole they learned about in college, they devour every morsel of controversy they’re fed without questioning its origin. It reminds me of the time Coulter said, “our blacks are better than their blacks” and the Perpetually Outraged took it to mean she owns slaves. Not only are jokes verboten, you’re not even allowed to use colorful language when talking about people of color.
-
8. CHINA ASSUMES NORTH KOREAN DESPOT IS SEXY
The Onion gets taken seriously so often you could do a whole article on these cases alone. Their Wiki page lists 16 times their jokes have been taken as fact but my favorite has to be when the Chinese government thought Kim Jong-un is sexy. Can you even conceive of a woman diddling her bean to this beta male butterball? Me neither, but in November, “The People’s Daily ran a 55-page photo spread of North Korean leader Kim Jong-un after he was declared The Onion’s Sexiest Man Alive for 2012.”
-
7. NEOCON SITE LINKS HARRY POTTER TO SATANISM
OK, one more Onion example. I have to include this because it exposes a group almost as annoying as communists. Back in 2001 WorldNetDaily ran an article about Harry Potter leading children down the long dark path to Satanism and the author cited the following quote from the Onion:
”Harry is an absolute godsend to our cause,” said High Priest ‘Egan’ of the First Church of Satan in Salem, MA. “An organization like ours thrives on new blood – no pun intended – and we’ve had more applicants than we can handle lately.”
A quick Google search reveals the passage has been cited by fundamentalists many times. Even if you’ve never heard of The Onion, how could these people not spot the clues such as “godsend” and “new blood”? Jesus Christ, people!
(NOTE: That’s the actual photo The Onion used.)
-
6. VP CANDIDATE CALLS RUNNING MATE “THE STENCH”
After years of relentless hammering by Democrats, the GOP decided to go with the squarest and most impossibly squeaky-clean candidate imaginable. Not only had Romney never inhaled, he never even held a joint. He never had any extramarital affairs. I’m not even sure his religion lets him drink coffee, so when someone jokingly pretends Paul Ryan refers to Romney as “The Stench,” the scandal-starved media grabs it and runs.
ARTICLE CONTINUES HERE
I had a TUFTS university religion professor refer to the onion Harry Potter article as truth.
Well, the joke tellers must be dying out if Nick Kroll can get three shows.
my buddies made this awesome and hilarious rap video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vRhkrHxSf6I
turns out there’s a lot of anti-funny asians out there… and non asians.
Those Taki’s Mag commentators on Gavin’s childbirth article were just as inept as any Maddow-parroting, MSNBC-gawking gawker-readin’ liberal. Takimag commentators remind me of angst-ridden straight-edge dudes who eschew any and all libertine escapism or irreverence and so end up projecting rage from their legitimate grievances towards innocuous, mundane or neutral things: Kids playing video-games to them is a symptom of the insidious “pussification of the american male.” LOL. Meanwhile, the finger-pointing, screeching, shrieking liberals remind me of sheltered children who have never been far beyond the safe confines of their neighborhood and curfew: They don’t know how to deal with vigorous opposition to their views except to accuse their opponent of being a Bad Man. Anyone who in anyway whatsoever resembles that Bad Man — such as making an off-color joke — must also be a Bad Man and you can’t be around Bad Mans because they’re bad bad bad!
Oh jesus christ
Maybe it’s because when the world doesn’t give you the excess of attention you think you deserve for farting around in a park for an hour, you write a ‘political essay’ bemoaning how the world isn’t fun enough for you.
Here’s a quiz. What’s actually funny: a recognizable ex ‘taste-maker’/semi-famous ‘personality’ parodying the most obvious target imaginable while only half in character or a good-natured cripple falling over? If you picked Option B, you win the opportunity to re-edit your video so it’s more killer and less filler.
Keep ‘em coming buddy!