Official Street Carnage Street Team Scout Tom Miller sent us a link to a painting up above, which immediately induced a sense of déjà vu, as well as a mild headache and a vague sense of nausea combined with a weepy sort of sentimentality.
Here’s the entire painting, which is called Two Satyrs by Peter Paul Rubens, who himself is a distant ancestor of Pee Wee Herman:
Something look familiar? You bet your sweet bippy it does! The beard, the devilish smirk, the alcohol—there’s no mistaking the fact that this is one of Gavin’s ancestors.
Extensive research revealed that, indeed, the model used for this painting was none other than Cormack Miles McInnes, an itinerant Scottish traveling showman, juggler, bon vivant, and fashion critic from the early 1600s. His standard punchline—”More haggis? No thanks—I’VE HAD PLENTY ALREADY!” vent viral throughout Europe in 1612 with the same intensity Jimmie “J. J.” Walker’s “Dy-no-mite!” won over previously wary white TV audiences in the 1970s. The devil horns are not a prop, either, but were a form of body modification popular among Scottish skeptics of that era.
We didn’t have time to check out who was the model for the character in the background, but it was obviously a Jew.
—STREET CARNAGE
Gavin’s ancestor has permanent rape face.
Grapes are the hot new accessory this fall!
if this is real, that is fuckin crazy