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Does this look like the kind of man who would eat people? Well, yeah, it kind of does, but the legal question is whether he actually sought to eat his wife.
A federal complaint filed in October alleged that former NYPD officer Gilberto Valle conspired online to cook and eat “a number of women,” but his lawyer is now arguing that this was all part of some harmless online role-playing.
Such “role-playing” included writing an online document that detailed the methods and materials needed to abduct, kill, and eat his wife, who to our knowledge remains safe, alive, and entirely uneaten at press time.
One of Valle’s alleged “co-conspirators” in the plot is Michael Van Hise, who reportedly offered his own three-year-old stepdaughter up to be raped during one digital session. Pictured below, Van Hise—regardless of his actual guilt or innocence—has a face and a haircut that sort of SCREAM “sex offender”:
But some now say the case against Valle is falling apart and that he was not actually negotiating to pay someone $5K to help him abduct, kill, and eat his wife. He was only joking. It was part of a natural sexual identity that he was indulging online via his First Amendment rights.
Do you believe him? And if you do, does he maybe deserve some jail time or at least a thorough psychiatric evaluation?
Malcolm in the middle of eating people
He shouldn’t go to jail for “role-playing” but then I don’t want this creep to be a cop either…