Welcome to Birmingham, Alabama. With no professional sports teams, no geographic features of note and oft-referred to as the Pittsburgh of the South, Birmingham doesn’t really have any major attractions. At all.
Welcome to Birmingham, Alabama. With no professional sports teams, no geographic features of note and oft-referred to as the Pittsburgh of the South, Birmingham doesn’t really have any major attractions. At all. Boasting the tenth highest crime rate in the country and a murder rate well above national averages, the coolest thing to do in The ‘Ham is pack up and move away. As fast as possible. But that hasn’t stopped the residents of Birmingham from dreaming big dreams — dreams of being discovered; dreams of being a real-life big city model; or at least doing soft-core porn or like, being in one of those car shows where you stand around in a bikini or something.
It’s nice to know that even as the industry that this fair city was built upon crumbles into ruin, delusion and entitlement are still alive and well. For many, Model Mayhem is the only hope, the only way out. Because, you know, FUCK having a talent or something important to say, getting an education and a good job, working hard and making your own destiny… they’re going to be models.
Stay gold, Birmingham. Stay gold.
Send your Model Mayhem submissions to delusion.parade@gmail.com.
Hat Tip: Thieving Magpie
Haha. Oh man. Slowing us all down. Looking forward to moving into space.
This makes me feel a ~little~ better about also being from Roanoke. These are great btw- keep ‘em up…
The mayhem’s been broughten.
i wonder if a dude has tried to aim for and/or try to fill in that juggalo tattoo with his cum
NEVER FORGET MEMPHIS
I like this, but I can’t help but enjoy the irony of someone who’s fooling himself into thinking he’s a writer making fun of people fooling themselves into thinking they’re models.
I FUCKING LOVE THIS COLUMN!!! i actually used to search model mayhem whenever i visited my hometown from LA and was hungoever…it always makes me feel good about myself plus it makes me horny thinking of how easily i could fuck those ugly girls if i were feeling particularly depraved haha…it better than porn!
ahhhhh inbreeds are fun
nooooooooooooo
why is this real?????
dick. what, they’re not attractive enough? let’s see your gorgeous mug then. this kind of patronizing arrogance is so… lame.
btw “I like this, but I can’t help but enjoy the irony of someone who’s fooling himself into thinking he’s a writer making fun of people fooling themselves into thinking they’re models.”. -genius.
That’s the most perfect placement of a Hatchet Man tattoo I’ve ever seen.
^^ How can a joke this simple go over your head man? GURNF? (that’s scooby doo’s bemused grunt)
oh man please keep these coming
kiss kid is doing it so rong it’s painful to look at
agreed with queefingway on the icp tattoo. the only place better/worse would be her forehead.
All about Asian Business Lover!
i am so embarrassed
Incredible. I wish these were baseball cards. Would never trade Giraffe Scarf.
this is my favorite post in months
I thought that hatchman tattoo was a necklace. Now I’m just sad. But I bet she’s a fucking queen in the juggalo community!
hatchman, hatchet man, whatever.
Best yet.
By a fucking mile.
@Gg glad I’m not the only one
@truthstore not even for constipated orange dress tiptoeing in the woods?!?!?
Blue t-shirt leaning on the fencepost is what I fear I’d get matched with on eHarmony.
this is sadder than the fat kraut withe pretty nails sucking on the condom