A charred body has been found in the burnt-out cabin where former police officer Christopher Dorner held his last stand against a SWAT team this Tuesday.
At this moment it’s impossible to identify the remains, but the odds are Chris Dorner was the person who burnt to a crisp.
Or was it?
Through careful research of photos, I’ve discovered that Christopher Dorner might not have been a former cop after all, but Chaz Bono, formerly known as Chastity Sun Bono, testicle-faced daughter and son of Cher and Sonny Bono, and former Dancing with the Stars contestant.
Comparing photos of Chris Dorner and Chaz Bono, the resemblance is uncanny. Granted, Dorner looks more well-trained, but Bono would probably have a lot of spare time to work out while going through whatever treatment he used to become black.
Exactly why Bono would pass himself as a former cop who got fired after reporting to his superiors about what may or may not have been a case of police violence, beats me, but I suspect that there are some pretty powerful movers and shakers behind this. Like the Illuminati or ZOG or something.
Or aliens. They’re fucking everywhere, man. They’ve been watching us for years. And I know Cher is at least half-extraterrestrial.
Something smells fishy here.
But then again, that just might be Chaz Bono’s charred crotch.
If I’m right, then Chaz Bono entered this world as a petite white girl in March 4, 1969, and left it on February 12, 2013, as a butch black man.
Rest in peace, sweet prince.