I thought of this last night while stoned and dictated it into my phones Voice Memo app. Ahem. Everywhere in the world, pink is considered a girl color and blue is considered a boy color. Why is this? I’ll tell you why.
I thought of this last night while stoned and dictated it into my phones Voice Memo app. Ahem.
Everywhere in the world, pink is considered a girl color and blue is considered a boy color. Why is this? I’ll tell you why: Women instinctually want to appear warm and friendly and good to touch so they can propagate the species. Conversely, men want to appear strong and tough and able to hunt large game. Pink is like warm, healthy skin (for whites, at least) and it also looks like inner mouths and inner pussies (for all races). It’s inviting because it means, “Flushed with blood.”
Wait, that picture with this text is freaking me out. I have to make something clear here. Though children are not sexual beings, their palette of preference comes from generations and generations of learned adult sexual patterns. This is also true with Barbies and ridiculously muscular Action Figures. It’s their instincts that makes them want these strange exaggerations of adult needs — but they do not have adult needs. Okay?
All right, back to work. Blue is the opposite of pink because it means “without blood” and successfully conveys the male is not soft or emotional or even a human being. He’s a rock. The emotional aspect of pink is just as important as the “Warm and inviting” one. Being emotional is a good thing for a mother because you want her to care about her young and snuggle them and stuff. Cold is a good characteristic for a man because good hunters and providers are emotionless. Hunting (especially with a bow) is really difficult and keeping your cool is a big part of making it happen. Hunters will often talk about “Moose Fright” where they simply froze and were unable to launch the bow. That means no food for the family. If a man is cold and emotionless he is more likely to nab his prey and, subsequently, feed his family.
I have based this on 0 research or evidence and pulled it out of my ass but I still believe it to be 100% true.
UPDATE: Here’s the Voice Note. My wife walked in right at the end and heard that last sentence out of context.