Posted by
Street Carnage
• 09.20.12 09:10 pm


Chileans have personalities and temperaments that are happy and friendly, but they make good security guards and watchmen, too. They are usually patient with small children, wary of strangers, and very courageous. Chileans are intelligent, but they can also be a bit stubborn.

They are complex, fragile, unpredictable and temperamental and need constant support and encouragement. More than any other South Americans, Chileans need to be needed. Even when all needs are satisfied, they can be irritable and cranky. They have an uneasy, delicate temperament. The contradictory nature of Chileans gives their temperament the wild mood swings and possible temper tantrums. They are easily offended and will sulk and wallow in self-pity for a long time when they get hurt.

Chileans are very physical. Expect sex with Chileans to be a fully encompassing sexual experience. Lots of tender foreplay, massages afterwards, candles lit by the bedside, soft music in the background, delicious scented potpourri, everything to appeal to all senses. It will be delicate and passionate and an experience you won’t soon forget. But do not expect too much novelty and experimentation because Chileans are very conservative people. Some Chileans might be willing to try something new but they will never be the ones to suggest it, you have to or it will never happen. They might go along with your idea because they do enjoy new experiences. Make them always feel safe and secure when trying anything new and they might love it and incorporate it into your regular sex life.

Chileans often display these 16 telltale personality traits:

  1. 1. Superficial charm and good “intelligence”
  2. 2. Absence of delusions and other signs of irrational thinking.
  3. 3. Absence of “nervousness” or psychoneurotic manifestations.
  4. 4. Unreliability
  5. 5. Untruthfulness and insincerity
  6. 6. Lack of remorse or shame
  7. 7. Inadequately motivated antisocial behavior
  8. 8. Poor judgment and failure to learn by experience
  9. 9. Pathologic egocentricity and incapacity for love
  10. 10. General poverty in major affective reactions
  11. 11. Specific loss of insight
  12. 12. Unresponsiveness in general interpersonal relations
  13. 13. Fantastic and uninviting behavior with drink and sometimes without
  14. 14. Suicide rarely carried out
  15. 15. Sex life impersonal, trivial, and poorly integrated
  16. 16. Failure to follow any life plan

Chileans often exhibit a poor choice of words when speaking, motor clumsiness (driving is a major difficulty), non-verbal communication (gestures, facial expression, casual contact, etc.), and social interaction which is the most noticeable difficulty. In other words, Chileans often have impairments in face-to-face communication and two-way interaction with other people. The impairments in social interaction work strongly against Chileans. As children in school, especially in physical education classes, they are unfortunately targets of bullying because many of the other students mistake Chileans as being mentally retarded, which is definitely false. The students that end up as bullies pick on Chileans just because he or she is different.


A smiling Chilean man offers a sampling of a spicy native dish from which he’s obviously already taken several hefty bites.

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Comments
  1. Lasse says:

    This is the silliest and best thing I’ve read all year!

  2. Right now, an intern at Gawker is scratching his head, confused, unsure whether or not to pull the “Racist” alarm next to his desk.

  3. Nate says:

    THat’s one damn fine looking pork-chop. At least what looks like a pork-chop in my eyes.

  4. Schmozzy Schmozbourne says:

    So, all Chileans are Scorpios?

  5. heroin town says:

    i’m a retard who doesn’t realize this was taken from several sources—i.e. dog-breeding, astrology, sociopathy, and Asperger’s profiles—and that was the whole joke. i’m really, really fucking stupid. i’m so fucking stupid i didn’t realize that most people got the joke and didn’t think they’d chanced upon some “gotcha!” moment. but what do i know? i call myself “heroin town.”

  6. raymes says:

    Their wine region is amazing. Carmenere grape is only found in Chile. Glug glug.

  7. lester says:

    I’ll show you an amazing region.


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